Our Kids Had No Homework in the U.S. Then We Moved to Spain.
In Tennessee, our kids attended a school in a highly ranked district. Their standardized test scores were excellent, and both kids were on track for each of their grade levels. They rarely had homework; instead, they were required to read for 20 minutes every evening. The kids had supportive teachers and an engaged administrative team. The only real concerns ever voiced by teachers were minor behavioral issues that we could work with them to correct.
In other words, our kids were well-performing students, and we had almost no concerns.
One of the questions we asked ourselves over and over as we prepared to move was what this move would do to our children. They had friends, a familiar school community, and after-school activities they loved. Will and I didn’t want to disrupt their stability – something we highly value for our kids.
However, our desire to show them the world prevailed.
I am frequently asked via social media messages (and in WhatsApp groups) what people should know about bringing their kids to Spain when it comes to schools. I don’t have a one-size-fits-all answer, but there are some key points to keep in mind.
Leaving Old Friends Behind
If you’ve established a life in a particular community, remember that your kids have, too. They probably have neighborhood friends, school friends, after-school activity friends, friends at your place of worship, and so on.
My son was transitioning to middle school, so leaving behind some of those old friends was a natural friction point. In some ways, it made the move to Spain easier because he needed to establish new social connections anyway. One particularly close friend’s parent was in the military, and we knew they’d be moving to a new state soon. We explained that creating a new friend group was part of transitioning to middle school, and he could do it just as easily in Spain.
My daughter is more reserved and shy. She tends to latch onto one friend, and they remain besties for the entire year. She’s a very kind and respectful kid who really wants others to like her, so making friends goes at a slower pace. We talked to her about moving to a different classroom every year and how moving was a lot like that – just in a different place.
Each kid has found their tribe in one way or another. My daughter is still shy and reserved, and she has one best friend she tends to hang out with. (We encourage her to branch out.) My son found a group of boys with whom he’s in constant communication.
Academic Expectations
Coming from a school without homework didn’t quite prepare the kids for the expectations at their new school in Spain. While the elementary level of required studying is similar, the middle school level is a whole other ball game. Having had no homework also means a lack of study skills. It’s something we’ve struggled with all year.
Our international school also has high expectations for independence and completing work on time. Both kids have struggled somewhat with this concept. I’m not sure if this is more a result of American culture in general or if our school perhaps did a little too much handholding. Either way, the international experience of more independence has been good for both of them.
Culture
The culture at an international school is quite different than the culture of our local school back in Tennessee. Our school in Tennessee, while in a “nice” area of our city, was pretty diverse socioeconomically. I loved this for my children, as it provided them with exposure to kids from all walks of life.
At our international school, we’re paying tuition to be there, which means everyone has the financial means to be there one way or another. The socioeconomic diversity is lacking, but in fairness, that’s the case with any private school setting.
I love that every day our kids are at school, they’re exposed to others from all over the world. Just a few of the countries represented include Russia, Ukraine, China, Spain, and France. It’s an incredibly international environment, which I believe offers a unique perspective on the world at large. In an increasingly global economy, what better way to gain empathy and understanding of other cultures than to learn side-by-side with students from those cultures?
Conclusion
An international school isn’t right for everyone. We chose this option to make the transition easier on our kids, who had never been exposed to the Spanish language. But the longer the kids are there, the more we’re proud of how they’ve adjusted to an academically challenging school. Moving to a new country was difficult enough, and adding the academic component was yet another hurdle to overcome.
In retrospect, a public school might have been an option for us, but it would likely have meant holding both kids back a year in school to give them time to adjust to the language. I’ve heard of other families doing this exact thing. It also sometimes allows kids to form friendships with other children in their immediate community because they’re at the same neighborhood school.
Would they learn the language faster in a public school? Absolutely. Is it worth the stress and anxiety to push them to learn it faster? I don’t know. We had already asked a lot of them by making this move. Making their lives easier while we all settle in seems like a no-brainer.